two years after the atrocity of divorce, I am still shattered. I have still not been able to return to this story but it goes on developing in the background of my mind. I have matured --or perhaps just gotten old--through the devistation of this disaster I am still enduring. when I return to this story if I am ever able to do so, it will have much more depth and clearity than the former versions.
I am working in a factory. It is mindless work for the most part so It might leave me time to ponder while working, and I might work on the story then. I've been pondering it, anyhow
I look back on what I ahve posted here and it looks all very shabby and shallow, almost shamefully so, but I am not ashamed. it was part of the proccess, part of the …
Read more >
I wrote a blog and it vanished when I published.
I’m less and less knowing how to do thisI’m gradually recovering from the complete demolition of my life and my soul by my dearest friend
I’m trying to write again but all my time and energy is consumed in working and just trying to get by
This July I am going to edit this wiki as part of my camp Nano projectRead more >
Back in the real world, where this story increasingly doesn't exist, I'm now profoundly shattered, and I no longer hold on to any hope of writing for the moment. my soul is shreadded and if I am to continue in mortal life it seems my time and energy from this point on may have to be entirely channeled into working for very low wages to pay the rent and the huge debts I unjustly received when my "eternal companion" beterayed the family entirely by divorcing me in a very hostile spirit. am I just being overdramatic? No it's actually far more painful than I am able to put into words, nothing I could write would do it justice. that overdramatic nonsense is just an objecctive description of the very surface of the pain and disfuntion I am passi…Read more >
November is the Month of Nano.
For Nano this year I chose to begain a complete re-write and completion of Destiny of dreams. Although I have had many other things going on in my life and thus little time for focused writing, I have been keeping my word count caught up bareley and in so doing filling in alot of gaps in world creation and backstory which will be very helpful in my being able to writ a complete story when the time comes and i am able to actually take time to write.
The approach I am taking is I am wring the story over from the begining [arriving at the planet, not the newstart begining] and when I come to somehting thatraises backstory questions I stop and answer them I've been stuck at the inn with Dara Jeen for a week or so…Read more >
The NaNo project didn't go well, but was still productive. Although I "won" nano, I did not write a complete story. However, I did alot of very helpful charactor development and world building. I have also started a picture book based on the first part of the Nano.
Although I have done very little actual focused writing in the past year I've been doing alot of thinking and I am feeling very ready to do some much better writing as soon as I have my life in order enough to take some time out for more focused writing. The same is true with artwork. I am feeling very hopeful about my progress on all aspects of this project.Read more >
After several months of not having access to a computer I have obtained a laptop in anticipation of doing a very dedicated Nanowrimo this coming November.
I've gone through alot of personal and spiriitual growth over the past few month and I anticipate this will have a positive effect on my writing when I manage to get time to write again.
I am planning to do a backstory about Matthias Daniels and his little brother Sammy for my Nano. Theoretically it's going to be a complete Novel of the sort that's aimed at about 10 year olds.
I've got alot of non-writing relating commitments right now,--family things,personal things, housekeeping things,spiritual things, a new part time job, the pow wow, etc... but I am looking forward to getting back t…Read more >
I haven't been online at all these past few months and haven't been writing as such but I have been thinking about it alot and working on things in my mind. I am very excited to be getting back to writing, many plans on how to make the story better and where to go with it, but I've no Idea when I will have time to focus on it again. this doesn't concern me though becuase I know when the time is right it will happen and in a way which will serve God and serve the needs of both myself and whomever else the audiance of this story eventually, years from now, turns out to be.Read more >
I haven't been writing much or online much because I am dealing with foundational problems that I want to get cleared up before I get back to writing so that when I do turn my attention back to writing I will be able to give it my full attention. I'm putting my life in order.
I supose paragangia wiki forms a part of my hoarding, but I think also it was a way of making order-- things with a place, things in place, rather than just a random stash of stuff.
when I get back to writing, I intend to organize things both here and on my computer, get rid of alot of old things which are not historically significant, reduce duplication, and then go forward in a much more focused way.
it will [for me, being currently the only audiance of this]be woth…Read more >
Many things have happened since my last update, which have kept me overly busy on real life things, and without any time to write, so I have not sat down at the computer to wrtie anything. I have done a few minot art projects related to the story, I thave thought about things as things come up in daily lif, but the story has not uncommon for me this time of year.
I'm constantly looking forward to a time when i will have time to write again, or will take time to write again. I've come to the awareness that it truely would be within my power to just drop all else and write. I could let my garden die, my chickens really only take a few minutes each day, my housework never gets caught up anyhow, my family doesn't want to learn and grow and wou…Read more >
Although I have been working on other things--cosplay, gardening, babysitting Rodrick, homeschool Aubyn, reactivating the forums on storm artists, etc--And also have been somewhat depressed and dysfuntional the past few months, this story is never far from my mind.
Aubyn and I Made a three page long picture story of the begining of her version of Destiny of Dreams, which starts basically whan Jason first encounters QUetazal and is resqued by Harris. the drawings were 5 minute sketches, but it was still a readable picture story, and it made me happy.
[arround the same time I was doing that, I posted on here most of the files of the start of the latest version of Desiny of dream and inserted pictures, including those pictures,at the points w…Read more >
I like drawing picturesRead more >
February 10 2014
I have gone back to the feeling that this story should never be published commercially. I should publish something commercially but not this story or any part of this story. this story ought to grow as it is and be published here on this wiki as a collection of links to backstory. Bits of it could be also published as a book. if I ever complete any book length and quality part I could just as well self-publish it either as a physical book or as a ebook.
The fact is I'm not Scott and what works for him isn't what works for me. Holding back sharing so I can be sold by someone else later is not what my writing is about.
I want to actually post the whole book on the WIKI. and make links to the time line to organize it, and take f…Read more >
January 31 2014
I have been working on History of Paragangia. It annoys me because it is a mental love story with very little action, and in a sense is just one long missionary discussion disguised as a love story. But more than that it annoys me because it is so very badly written and so incomplete.
I do see positive potential it it but it is very far from realizing that potential. I figure it will take me at least two years at this point to complete the story to the point where I can start correcting the writing style and start to really feel good about this object of my creation.
I figured that by comparing the number of chapters in the book currently to the number of weeks in a year. I figure I could do about one chapter per week if I r…Read more >
September 26, 2013
since my last update, I have started my craft selling business, Green Phoenix Creations , have started home schooling my duaghter, my husband has had a bunch of new medical problems and the dogs have had 5 puppies.
as an author, I have hoped for more time to write and not gotten it. I have thought much about the story and written only very little, but I am still going forward slowly gradually filling in holes as I have time now and then. most recently I have began a new edition of the first Jason Scott-Harris part of Destiny of Dreams , based off the version which was called the New Start Version . the current version is called the Jouney to D'zeron version, because initially I was just going to focus on the chapters bet…
Read more >
the past few months I have hardly been online and I ahve not been writing. but the story goes on developing in my mind, and my skills at writing and story creation keep improving. I look forward to the time when I ahve time to sit down and write down all that has grown in my mind. I can't imagine when that time will come,
it is summer and I am gardening, spending time with my children grandchildren and parents, working on home repair and improvement projects, and starting a vending business called Green Pheonix Creations, and planning to home school my duaghter in the fall.
since I created this website, I feel much less urgancy about writing this story, which is a good thing. even if this website is deleted--which I often supose might happ…
Read more >
for the past few months I have been busy worjking on housework and personal self improvement and spiritual growth , etc, and as a result I have not had time for writing. I am making good and important progress in my life, and I'm s ure in due time it will bear fruit in writing also.Read more >
January 22 2013
I tried to work on Matthias and Taz this week. I have broken it down into three "parts" representing time periods. I am going to write each of those in sort of NaNo novel style jsut to get some more completed material out on this story.
Part one is called Matthias and Sammy, and covers the time from when Matthias discovers dreaming to the time he leaves for KSU
Part two is called Matthias and Jason and covers the time from when He arrives in Manhattan to the time he begains as Jason's assistant.
Part three is called Matthias and Taz, and goes from when he meets her in his capacity as Jason's assistant to the time they get married [he has been stalking her for awhile and knows she is SHeila's mother prior to this]
That's the end…Read more >
November 28 2012, Yesterday I submitted a file with over 57000 words for the win. Feeling really great about this accomplishment, even though I still need to work on the story a lot more.
November 15, halfway through NaNo I have over 30,000 words but only about 18 of 60 scenes which need to be included for this story to be complete.
I'm at a stuck point on the story, in that I'm up against the LDS part and the doctrine and policy parts don't add up...It doesn't make sense for Desmond to be excommunicated for becoming Paragangian, but he might perceive it that way, since aliens are not yet allowed to join the church in his time. I guess if He was speaking out against the church policy against aliens publicly he could be excommunicated for tha…Read more >
Edit Oct 25 2012
last week for several days I wrote in great detail an r-rate and thus unpublishable Novel detailing the relationship between Jason's assistant at KSU, Matthias and Tazmenae , a female student who tries to seduce Jason and ends up with Matthias [because they are both half Paragangian and half genetically altered Moonlight Oasis people created to have a genetic ability to seduce Paragangians] . I love this story but I'm not sure I'll ever be able to write it in a less than r-rated form.
Around that time, I had a talk with neil in which he sort of Dared me to agree to go to Mexico and to write a book and publish it, so I declared I am going to Mexico in the next 3 years, and I am going to complete and seek to publish this years…Read more >
The past week or so I have been adding pictures to the Wiki. I want to have all the illustrations I have made for this story together in one place and indexed in some way so i can easily find what I am looking for. A wiki is the perfect way to do that.
I have been going through my DA account downloading all the pictures I have posted which have been lost from my computer files, due to the crash of Neil desktop, my desktop and the back up drive over the past few years. I am very grateful for having posted as much as I did on Art sites, so that those illustrations are not lost forever. this wiki will serve more efficiently as that sort of backup.
EDIT SEPT. 24----I did not finish collecting all the pictures here. I did gather all the pictures …Read more >
I've concluded that this wiki is the idea media for this story, the random linking of Ideas is exactly how this story is created, so it fits this media perfectly. I think when this wiki is completed, not that it ever will be, I will have no desire to write any books of this story.
I come here and edit this at random to relax. It is one of the few things I do which are purely relaxing, though I also enjoy drawing, and stringing beads.
my life is stressful and I am working very hard all the time, on spiritual and personal quests which are all in my mind, not having much if any physical manifestation. learning things, healing relationship, seeking order and organization.
I need a break. I am grateful to have this one thing which I can truly rela…Read more >
Life is busy with one daughter expecting a baby in a few weeks and trying to correct the other daughter's IEP, plus many church things related to the new ward building and the temple dedication ceremony. I haven't had time for much creation, but I am still often thinking about it. The world of Paragangia continues to grow in the background, always. Being a creature of dreams it does not need conscious awareness to live and thrive.
My latest media is graphic novel. I am working on a script for a graphic novel based on an older version of destiny of dreams. I've decided my writing style lends itself well to that media, because I can offer thoughts action and words of more than one person at exactly the same time in graphic novel form without …Read more >
I want to say Happy New Year to everyone.Read more >